


Lost and Found:

by syri_chii



Category: Arashi (Band), Johnny's Entertainment
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-07-12
Updated: 2012-07-14
Packaged: 2017-11-09 19:46:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 8,981
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/457694
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/syri_chii/pseuds/syri_chii
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They could have been them. It should have been them but for a reason no one can tell it didn't happen.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> These are five one shots I have started to write when I was still in college. I thought I would never finish these due to many factors but there's a part of me that keeps on telling me to finish it. Unbeta'ed again. ('coz there's no intention of posting in any comm.) May be considered as a short series... or not. The time line is present time.

This is supposed to be a love story, the typical A falls in love to B, and they get together thus a happy story. However, what if, for unknown reason, C and D enter the story? Where do they place themselves and will the story end happy ever after? 

Perhaps this is different from the ones you used to read or heard of but some of you may have an idea of what I’m talking about that sometimes, people don’t end up with the people they think they’re meant to be with. That even if everyone thought they should be them, it couldn’t be them. 

“You look good together. How come you two are not couples? ” They would just smile at the persons who ask them and shrug. 

Yes, we fit to be together like apple and cinnamon, bread and butter, peanut butter and jelly but why can’t we be together? 

They ask themselves that question thousand times as they lie on their beds with their special persons beside them. Realization will dawn to them as morning breaks in. 

It’s because I chose to be with this person lying beside me. It’s my choice that makes everything different. They smile as they finally find answer. 

This is not another angst story, I believe yet most people would think it is. It can’t be helped. After all, people have their own definition of happy ending story. Let’s just say this is my version of happy ending. 

In the beginning, they’re just the two of them, Jun and Masaki, always been Jun and Masaki, but when other people; Nino and Sho appear in, that’s when their lives start to turn upside down.


	2. Relationships we take for granted

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jun has been Masaki's best friend for the longest time until Nino appears and that's when their worlds get tangled up

Jun’s packing for his trip when he sees a picture of the five of them. He takes it up and looks at it. Aiba and Nino standing close each other, Ohno in between them smiling through the camera.

“Jun, your manager’s on the phone.” Sho calls his attention.

“Yeah, I’ll be there for a second.”

“So, when will you be coming back?” Sho asks as soon as he put down the phone. Jun sits beside him.

“I haven’t left and you’re asking me that?”

“What? I want to know so I can put it in my schedule.”

Jun smiles at him before leaning closer to give Sho a kiss on the lips.

 

\---

I had him first. I always thought I’d always have him. Jun had always thought that way.

 

He and Aiba were together first. They were together before anything, anyone else. Even if Aiba was older than him, he was the one who always took care of him.

He first heard the name Nino coming out from Aiba’s mouth during their high school days. Ninomiya Kazunari or most often called as Nino was his classmate back then, a new student.

He didn’t quite understand why Aiba developed an affection to Nino when all he knew the latter was so plain and simple. It was so unlikely for his best friend to fall for someone who’s quiet and cold person.

He used to think the new guy was plain brat and. He could sense it from the way the Nino liked to be left alone.

“I don’t know if you hit your head or something but having a crush on him is suicidal…” Jun commented as he watched his friend stared at new student sitting near the window.

“What do you mean by that?”

Jun rolled his eyes and looked at the new student.

“From what I can sense, he’s the type of person who prefers to be alone and I don’t think you, appearing in his life would be such a good idea.”

Aiba gazed at the new student who was now playing a game console.

“Well, I could still try. Who knows, he might fall in love with me too.”

Jun released a sigh. Honestly, his friend never ever gave up on something aside from the fact he loved challenges.

“Right. I would make him fall for him.” Aiba said.

“Good luck,” was Jun all could say.

 

\---

 

“I don’t need your concern. I’m already grown up.”

Jun withdrew his hand and slowly stepped back.

“I know what I’m getting in, okay.” Aiba continued.

“Right. You’re capable of making decision by yourself. You don’t need my help anymore.”

“Jun.” Aiba said with tone of guilt. He didn’t mean to say those things to his friend. It’s just that sometimes he wanted to do stuffs for himself too without someone telling him to. This time, he reached for Jun’s hand. But Jun took another step backward and shook his head.

“No, you’re right. I guess, I always thought you won’t be growing up, that you’ll always be someone who will always need my help.”

“Your guess is wrong.”

Jun stopped being best friend that day.

 

\---

 

Then one day he met Sakurai Sho while he was loitering in the school one summer vacation.

“You seem to be bearing the whole world’s problems.”

Jun turned and was about to say something when he found a familiar guy he’d seen in the school’s hall of fame.

“Sakurai-san.”

The former student council president two years ago guy smiled and took off his sunglasses and sat on the chair across Jun. He and Jun knew each other being both members of student council organization.

“So, how you’ve been doing?”

“I guess I’m okay.”

Sho laughed at the reply of the younger man.

“What do you mean? Is there something wrong?”

Jun didn’t answer, instead he smiled.”

“Oh wait. You’re all alone. That’s strange. Where’s Aiba-san?”

“He’s on vacation.”

Sho’s eyebrows furrowed and watched the younger man. “You two had a fight?”

“Well, you can say that.”

“Come on. It’s natural for best friends to quarrel sometimes.”

“It’s not the normal best friend fight you think it is.”

“Then what is it?”

“Well last semester a new guy named Nino joined my classes. Now, Aiba was interested to him that he decided to become friends with him. They got along well. Later, he told me that he has a crush on him.”

“So,”

“Lately, he and Nino had been hanging out together often. I think they are already together.”

“I didn’t know Aiba’s into guys. So what’s the problem there?”

“I… I don’t want Aiba to be close to anyone else but me.”

“And this Nino guy seemed to be snatching Aiba away from you?”

“Not snatching, more like he’s competing for Aiba’s attention.”

“Are you sure he’s competing against you for Aiba-san’s attention?”

Jun looked at the older man. What did Sho mean by that?

“I mean, did he clearly tell you he’s competing with you or something?”

“Well, we haven’t talk about that. Honestly, we haven’t talk to each other at all.”

“Then how could you say that he’s competing with you when you two haven’t talk. You know, I think you should talk to Nino first about that. Maybe you’re just thinking that but Nino doesn’t. And you should tell Aiba about how you want to spend some time with him too.”

“Well, about Aiba-chan, we haven’t talk since the last day of school. We had a major fight about him and Nino.”

“Why? What happened?”

“I said harsh words to him that day. Since then, we haven’t communicated to each other until now.”

“I, I’m sorry about that.” Sho moved and embraced Jun.

 

Aiba stood still outside the school gate as he watched the Jun and another guy under the big cherry tree. Jun was crying on the older man’s shoulder while the latter was comforting him. His grip on the plastic bags tightened as he continued to watch the two. Then he turned around and walked away. He had left the plastic bags full of foods at the gate.

 

\---

 

“Jun.”

Jun turned and saw Nino.

“Can I talk to you?”

“You like Aiba, do you?” Nino’s introductory words caught him off-guard. Jun chose to remain silent.

“Don’t try to deny it because I just know. It’s okay. You don’t have to admit it.”

“What it is that you want to talk about? I’m kinda busy.”

“Aiba, Aiba-chan was chosen to be an exchange student for three years.”

“So?”

“He’s leaving this coming Saturday. I thought you should know that.”

“I have plans on Saturday.”

“Jun, whatever you two had, I hope it would be fix before he go.”

“There’s nothing and if you don’t have anything to say, I have to take my leave.” He held on the knob and turned it.

“He misses you.” Jun faintly heard as he walked out the room.

 

\---

 

“You know, you’re stupid.”

Jun looked up and saw Sho’s stern but worried face. He sighed and went back on playing the teaspoon on the table.

“I don’t know what’s on your mind but I think you should tell him.”

“Tell him what?”

“That you…”

“No,” Jun cut him quickly.

“Jun.”

“I won’t say anything to him especially if it’s uncertain.”

“So now you’re uncertain.”

“I’m not supposed to be feeling this towards him. It’s just plain absurd.”

“What do you mean?”

“We’re best friends.”

“He and Nino are best friends too.” Sho pointed out. The younger man gave him a look.

“You’re not helping, really.”

“You know what I think. You’re scared, scared of losing him and the friendship you have.”

“Who won’t be scared if that will be the consequences of confessing that you’re in love with your best friend?”

“Then you’re really in love with Aiba. You yourself say so.” Sho smiled.

Jun tried to counteract the older guy’s statement but chose not to reply.

“But I think you should try. You won’t know what will happen unless you act.”

“I’m not a risk taker, Sho. You know that.”

Sho didn’t talk anymore. He watched the younger man, playing the teaspoon and coffee cup. It pained for him to see the other like that.

“Can I just have them both?”

“Sometimes, you’ve got to stop being selfish, Jun.”

 

\---

 

Jun came the day Aiba left. He did. He just didn’t show up face to face with Aiba and Nino. He couldn’t do it yet. So he watched Aiba go from afar. He was standing behind the post meters away from the two. His heart clenched when Aiba hugged Nino.

I should be the one hugging Aiba now.

Then he felt someone hold his hand. He turned and saw Sho behind him.

“Why don’t you…”

“No. I… He probably didn’t want to see me.”

“But you said Nino told you he misses you.”

“I…” He glanced once again and saw the two talking, Aiba holding to Nino’s hand while Nino was looking around.

“Maybe someday.” Jun smiled sadly. “When I’m okay and those two too.”

Sho watched the younger man looking at his best friend and his lover.

“Come on,” Sho tugged his hand. “I’m treating you.”

Jun looked at the older man who’s holding his hand and dragged him out the airport.

 

\---

 

Jun decided to do some self discovery and went overseas.

“You seem to be lost,” he heard someone. He turned and found a guy with a hat on.

“I think it’s okay to be lost sometimes because you are given an opportunity to discover things.” Jun’s newly found friend told him on the night before he went back. He was kind enough to see him off.

“I want to thank you for everything.” Jun bowed.

“Oh, it’s nothing. Ah,please don’t treat this as goodbye since I get the feeling we’ll see each other in the future.”

 

At present...

 

Jun spots Sho sitting on the waiting area of the airport. He approaches quietly though he’s sure the other’s listening to his phone again.

“Hey.” He pokes him on the shoulder.

Sho gets startled before he takes off his earphones and embraces him.

“So, how’s the place?”

Jun smiles before answering, “brought me back some memories.”


	3. Feelings we have

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Nino saw Jun and Aiba, he knew already that there's something beneath those hits and antics.

“I should be happy for him, right?” Aiba said, holding on Nino’s hand. He looked at him.

“I mean, that’s what best friend should feel right?”

Nino didn’t answer. Instead, he sat beside the older man and held closely his hand.

“I’m happy for him.”

There’s still no reply.

“I’m happy for him…” Then Nino heard a sob. He turned and faced Aiba who looked back at him, eyes were watery.

“But why do I feel like I’ve been rejected?”

\---

 

Nino has known Aiba and Jun since high school because they’ve gone the same school. Back then, those two were inseparable even if Aiba was one year older than them.

He and Jun meanwhile were classmates. Jun was the type of person who would talk to you if he has something to say to you while Aiba was the one who would greet anyone he sees in the hallway even if he doesn’t know them. He admitted that he didn’t like Jun first because of his cool aura and he was a little bit irritated at Aiba’s cheerful disposition. He had always wondered how the two got along well when their personalities were poles apart.

 

“You guys. If we didn’t know you two well, we would think that there’s something going on between you and Aiba.” Nino heard a classmate of his said to Jun. Aiba laughed at the said comment while Jun hit the latter on the head.

“Ouch. What’s that for?”

“Hmp, like I would fall for someone as stupid as him.”

“Hey.”

“Seriously, he’s not my type.”

“You’re not my type either.”

“Of course, because if I’m not mistaken your type is silent and loner one.” Jun said then glanced at Nino who was looking outside the window. Nino turned and looked back at Jun then Aiba. Then Jun saw Aiba’s face reddened.

“Aww, Aiba-chan why does your face all red?” He joked. Aiba, in reply, tackled Jun.

 

\---

“Hi.”

Nino heard. He looked up and found Aiba, sitting in front of him. It was lunchtime.

“Uh, hi.” He replied. Aiba grinned back at him. “If you’re looking for Jun-kun, I think he stepped out few minutes ago because he was being called by our teacher.”

“Oh, I see.” Aiba said. “Hey, do you want to eat lunch together?”

“Huh?”

“I mean, usually I eat lunch with Jun but since he’s out, I thought you might want to eat together. I don’t like eating alone.” Aiba explained. Nino eyed the older man in front of him that appeared to be shy.

“Okay then.”

“Yay.”

“I… I like to eat quietly, if you don’t mind.”

“Sure, sure Nino-chan.”

Nino twitched hearing the nickname he just earned from the other.

\---

Nino then remembered the time when Aiba admitted to him that he has a crush on him. It was one of his happy thoughts because he didn’t imagine the older man would bother to do a variety of things just to show his affection.

 

“Happy birthday, Nino-chan.” Aiba greeted him with a small cake on his hand. Nino stared at him who’s smiling.

“Make a wish then blow the candle.”

Nino closed his eyes for awhile then blew the candle.

“So what did you wish for?”

“More patience so I’ll be able to stand your craziness and that you’ll become smarter.” He grinned. Aiba pouted but then hugged him tightly.

_“I wish we’ll be together always until the end.”_

\---

He wondered if Aiba realized but since the day he and Aiba got together, Jun distanced himself from them. It was like he was avoiding them. Aiba asked him many times to go with them but he refused. He started to notice that Aiba was spending less time with Jun.

One day, he heard from one of his friends that Jun was now hanging out with Sho Sakurai, the former student council president.

“Aiba-chan.” He called the other man who was working in the kitchen.

“What is it?”

Nino stared at the older man for awhile.

“You and Jun-kun…” Nino noticed how Aiba’s body tensed before turning around to face him, smiling fake one.

“What about me and Jun?”

“You haven’t hanging out with him.

“He’s busy. You know him being a member of student council.”

“And you haven’t talking to him. Are you two okay?”

Aiba put stop whatever he was doing and sat beside Nino.

“We’re doing fine.”

Nino stared back at him. Aiba now put his hand on the other’s hand and gave a squeeze.

 

\---

Crack

Nino heard. It was strange he thought because he didn’t know where the sound came from.

Crack… Crack

Then he heard again. He came to realize that the sound was not coming from anything physically surrounding him. Aiba sat quietly beside him. He took a glance at the latter who was watching Jun and Sho, shoulder by shoulder, talking so casually. Jun was almost leaning to Sho who was showing something. Then Jun laughed simply and so was Sho. Nino now turned his gaze back to Aiba. He was still smiling.

Nino held to older man’s hand closely and tightly, body bending over to Aiba’s who in return, wrapped his arms around the smaller guy’s body.

Crack…

It was coming from Aiba. It was the sound of Aiba’s breaking heart.

\---

Nino had always known it but he never said anything. He was afraid, of what might happened, what would happened. What if Aiba left him? He tried to shake off those thoughts. He believed in Aiba. He trusted in Aiba. And he thought Aiba would need someone who would comfort him from the hurting he’s been trying to bear for a long time.

He didn’t think of what might be the real feelings of Aiba. He didn’t want to know. He just wanted to be with the older man. He wanted to stay by his side.

“I don’t know if you know it but you’re in love with him.” Nino whispered silently to Aiba who was sleeping peacefully beside him. He softly ran his fingers along with former’s hair.

“I love you so much.” He murmured close to other’s ear. He planted kisses on older man’s forehead and cheeks. He changed position, pulling the sleeping guy closer to him. He went back to sleep.

 

\---

“I’m going overseas.” Aiba announced one day.

Nino felt his world stopped after hearing what the bubbly guy just said.

“I was accepted as an exchange student.”

Nino locked himself that night and for the whole night, he didn’t sleep. He was playing videogames. He was pressing the buttons too hard that he didn’t notice his hands were already red and just like his hands; his eyes were red from crying.

 

\---

Aiba dropped his bag and quickly went beside Nino who was playing with his video game. He hugged him tightly from behind and bended his head on the gamer’s back.

“Nino.” He said muffled.

The other man didn’t reply.

“Kazu, am I doing the right thing?”

“Aiba-chan, does it feel like that? Do you feel you’re running away?”

Aiba with tears in eyes looked back him.

“I don’t know. Probably I think I’m trying to escape.”

Nino knew deep inside he’s not good in using comforting words. He never was. But that moment, he wished he was. So instead of saying reassuring things, he put down the controller and hugged Aiba until the older man had finally slept peacefully in his arms.

\---

“Masaki.” Nino called the other man’s first name, something he seldom did.

“You better take care of yourself there. Don’t do stupid things, huh?” Nino said as he tried to sound fine and even if his voice was breaking. Aiba, tears brimming in his eyes, smiled and pulled Nino to a tight embrace.

“I’m going to miss you.”

“Stupid.” Nino mumbled as he leaned closer to Aiba, trying to inhale the latter’s scent as much as possible.

The embrace lasted for awhile. Nino was thinking of not letting Aiba go until they heard Aiba’s flight was being announced.

“Well, that’s my flight.” Aiba spoke, his eyes were a little red.

“I’ll call you as soon as I arrive there so you better keep your phone open.”

Nino nodded.

“I guess I better be going now. Bye Bye Nino-chan.” Aiba started to walk toward the gate.

“Masaki.”

Aiba stopped and turned around. Nino was staring back at him.

“You… you better come back ha?”

Aiba watched Nino, his Nino stood there.

“I promise.”

Nino kept reminding himself that three years was not long and that time would pass quickly.

 

Months after Aiba left, he received an email coming from Sakurai Sho, asking if they could meet.

“Ninomiya Kazunari?” Nino looked and saw a man wearing a polo shirt paired with plain black pants.

“Yes and you are…”

“I’m Sakurai Sho, the one who sent you an email. I’m a friend of Matsumoto Jun. I believe you know him.”

“We went the same high school. What about him?”

“Did you know if there’s something going on between him and Aiba Masaki?”

“Masaki?” Nino’s face didn’t change but his voice did. “Well, they were close, best friends. Why do you ask about them?”

“Jun is very close to me and I’m really concerned for him.”

“Why do you need to know what happened in the past when you’re in the present? Is past that important to you?”

Sho didn’t answer. He took a sip of his coffee while Nino observed him.

“I don’t know what your purpose of meeting me up is but I’ll answer your early inquiries. Except friendship, Masaki hadn’t said anything about their status to him,” It’s the truth but it didn’t escape from Nino’s knowing what Aiba was experiencing whenever he saw Jun and Sho.

“They hadn’t talk during the last year of high school as Jun distanced himself from him, from us.”

“Did Aiba say something to you?”

“He didn’t say anything.”

“Okay.” And they fell in silence.

“You should tell your feelings to Jun,” Nino said before they parted ways. “Take your chances.”

Sho nodded and then started walking.

 

“Hello,” Aiba’s hoarse voice greeted Nino.

“Hi.” He heard from the background some noises. The other must has been trying to check the clock. “It’s past three in the morning here.”

“It’s past seven in the evening here.” He listened to the other breathed. He remembered then the nights he used to stay up just to listen the other slept beside him.

“So we’re not talking? You’ll be paying…”

“It’s okay, just once. I miss listening to you voice.” He didn’t tell the real reason because he’ll be teased for quite some time.

“But we just talked hours ago.”

“If you don’t want to talk, it’s fine. Just don’t hang up the phone.”

“Uh, okay.” Aiba yawned. Moments later, he fell asleep while Nino was still on the line.

“I love you.” Nino whispered as he was about to put down the receiver.

“I love you too.”

Nino’s surprised to hear it. Maybe Aiba was pretending to be asleep but the soft snoring he has been listening earlier returned quickly.

“Sweet dreams.”

 

At present...

The sound of his mobile phone ringing wakes him up. He fumbles through his messy night table, (Aiba is the one who keeps it organized)

“Hello.”

“I’m back.” Aiba’s excited voice almost makes him deaf. He glances at the calendar. The other’s one week early.

“Already?”

“Already. I was able to finish work early and they allow me to go home.”

“Uh, wait for me. I’ll be there in thirty minutes.”

“Okay.”

He finds Aiba watching the giant television which is showing Jun and Sho together in a talk show.

“They’re okay.”

Aiba’s surprised to hear a voice. He turns and sees Nino. His eyes go back to the screen and smiles.

“Yeah, they are and so are we.” He reaches the other’s hand, interlacing it with his.

“Let’s go home.”

“Hmm.”


	4. Words we forget to say

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sho has seen Jun in almost every possible ways and he's been with him through it all.

“Sho-san, this is Matsumoto Jun, first year class representative.”

“Hello. Nice to meet you, Sakurai-san. I’m Matsumoto Jun.”

“Nice meeting you too.”

“Sakurai-san…”

“Sho-kun. You can address me by that.”

“Jun-kun then.”

When their hands held, Sho felt an uncertain feeling of warmth towards the person standing in front of him; a feeling he never felt before.

\---

 

Sho had admired the younger man ever since they met. He had to admit that the other man looked attractive but what really caught his attention was his attitude, his personality, his desire to stand up and to be heard. He really admired the man for that trait. However, it wasn’t the only thing Sho like.

Jun’s good to talk with, any topic under the sun, a trait he had been looking for. At first, it was hard to talk with him because he had difficulty trying to open up. Sho was never good at talking about feelings but eventually he was able to, thanks to Jun.

Slowly, Sho noticed himself falling little by little. It was unintentional of course but then again he didn’t always have control over his feelings.

It was hard. It was hard to hide his feelings. Sho tried not went overboard, tried not to get too much close, tried not to worry and tried not say or show anything. It was really difficult. That’s why when he graduated and went to college he was relieved only for awhile because in the end, he felt half-complete. Summer break, he decided to visit his old school and saw him again. His feelings rekindled.

Jun looked heartbroken when he saw him again. It turned out he and his best friend Aiba fought and hadn’t talking to each other ever since.

\---

He was there to congratulate him when Jun graduated high school. They even celebrated together. And that same night, he found Jun was leaving the country.

“Austria?”

Jun nodded as he picked up his glass and drank on it.

“What are you going to do there?”

It took awhile before the younger man replied.

“I want to find myself.”

Sho heard about those soul searches or self-journeys but he didn’t believe on those. He actually laughed about them, thinking they were waste of time. But when he heard it coming from Jun, he found himself anxious.

“Are you sure about this?”

“I’ve been thinking about this for quite some time now and I think this is the right time for me to do this.”

“Is this about Aiba-san?”

Sho had no intention of bringing the topic but somehow words formed before he could think about.

“Maybe, I don’t know…”

Silence enveloped. Sho was thinking of what to say when Jun excused himself to go the restroom.

Sho pulled out the little box on his right pocket. He opened it and examined the ring. He closed it and placed it on the table while he waited for the younger man.

“I guess I just have to support you right?”

Jun looked at the other man smiling at him when he returned. He smiled too and sat beside him.

“Thanks.” Jun replied and reached for his glass when he saw the little box. He looked at Sho who signaled him to pick it up.

“It’s my graduation gift for you.”

Jun opened it and saw a ring. It was the ring he had been eyeing for months.

“Thank you.”

Sho was supposed to be confessing him but with what they were talking about, he couldn’t bring himself to say the words. In the end, he just said it was a graduation gift.

\---

Sho wanted the younger man to stay. He didn’t want him to go. Afraid what would Jun discover while on trip. That’s why, his hold was tight, almost gripping but when Jun looked at him in the eyes. He couldn’t help himself but to loosen.

“I’ll call you as soon as I reach the place.”

Sho just nodded. Jun reached for the older man’s hands. He squeezed them.

“I’ll be back. I just need time for myself. I need this.”

Sho was left with those words and something called trust.

Was he scared? He’s scared. He just didn’t want Jun to find out that he was. He was Jun’s source of strength. He didn’t want to be seen by the other falling apart.

 

\---

“I’m in love with someone.” Sho said out of the blue while drinking in the bar.

“Want to talk about it?” The person beside him politely asked.

“And he’s in love with his best friend, I think. He doesn’t acknowledge it but I know he is because of the way he talks about him. I could see and feel he’s in love with him.”

The other just nodded as Sho continued to talk.

“Tell him.”

“Eh?”

“Tell him how you feel.”

“It’s not that easy. I don’t want to…” Sho stopped. He now sounded Jun, afraid. The other person looked at him. “Now I’m starting to look like him.” Sho laughed bitterly.

“I think it won’t be bad.” He drank his beer. “Just say it.”

 

\---

“Jun.” Sho called. It was midnight.

“Oh, Sho-kun. You called?”

“There’s something I’ve got to say.” He paused. He could hear the younger man’s breathing over the phone.

“What is it?”

“I…”

“I miss you,” came out instead of ‘I love you’. Sho thought it would be unfair for Jun. He set out to find something. He wanted for Jun to find it first before he comes home. Jun’s breathing’s hitched and then returned to normal.

“I miss you too.” Sho could see the smile on the younger man’s face. The silence befell between them.

“I’m coming home.” Jun said finally.

“Hm, okay.”

“Will you be there to pick me up?”

A double meaning question, Jun didn’t want to sound like that but he thought deep inside he wanted to ask. He wondered if Sho would realize it. Sho didn’t reply at once.

“Of course, I’ll be there.”

“Okay, good night then.”

“Good night too.”

\---

Sho was there. He did come to pick Jun the day he came back. Before words were exchanged, he was already hugging the other man tightly on his arms.

“I miss you.”

“Hm…”

“So much.”

“Hm…”

“I love you.”

Sho whispered and this time Jun didn’t answer. He felt fear and so he embraced him closer gathering some strength to face him. He let go and looked at him.

“I know,” Jun said calmly. “You’ve been wanting to say it, right?”

“I…”

Jun smiled and reached for his hand.

“Let’s go home.”

“Okay.”

 

\---

Because perfect love stories don’t exist, people knew.

At first, they were doing fine. The relationship was smooth until few months ago when Jun received a call from Nino who was asking if they could meet up. Of course, Jun made up an excuse.

He noticed how Jun changed since the latter and Aiba stopped communicating. It seemed like the Jun he knew had disappeared and the person he’s with now was someone new. It hurt. And whenever he brought that topic, they would end up not talking the whole night, days and sometimes for a week. So he didn’t say anything about it.

Sho saw Jun looking through a letter, a postcard one time. He didn’t have to ask who it was from because he knew it came from Aiba. Jun had been keeping it like it was so precious. He placed it on his favorite book. He knew Aiba’s sending him postcards. Because in the end, Aiba couldn’t remain mad at Jun, because they were best friends, they would always be.

Sho watched him sleep beside him. It was the only time when he could see the other’s peaceful face. He watched him sleep on his arms every night but somehow, it felt like it wasn’t Jun.

Nino appeared at their doorstep, one summery day. Jun was the one who opened up the door. Sho was standing beside him.

“Masaki… Masaki is coming home.”

“Go.” He said to Jun. He could see the other struggling inside. “You have to face him soon.”

“But…”

“It’s okay.” But it’s not. Sho knew that Jun might not come back to him this time yet he wanted him to be happy.

“Okay.” Jun stood up, got his jacket and went out.

\---

Jun didn’t go home that day, the next and the day after. Sho didn’t want to think what happen but he couldn’t help himself to think the two getting together finally. His heart ached. Then he thought some diversion and saw the apartment in disarray.

He was cleaning up the mess when he saw a picture on the floor. He picked it up. It was a photo of Jun and Aiba together. He smiled sadly. Maybe Jun was better off with Aiba after all. He couldn’t be able to make Jun happy just like the way Aiba did. He sighed. Then the door opened. Sho looked up and saw Jun at the door, catching up with his breath.

“I’m…not…late…”

Before Sho could even speak, Jun moved quickly and kissed him. Sho blinked then closed his eyes, pulled the younger man closer.

“I’m sorry for making you wait. I love you.”

Sho broke the kiss and looked at the other’s eyes.

“I love you too.”

 

_At present..._

His phone ringing returns his attention back to apartment. He checks it and sees Jun’s number.

“Hello.”

“Hi.” Jun’s a little tired but happy voice replies. “I’m back.”

“Okay, I’ll be there. Wait for me, okay?”


	5. People who always are there for us from the start

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aiba comes to face Jun and tells him everything after three years

“So when will you return?” Nino asks though his eyes are on the TV screen. He’s playing his video game, the one he usually plays whenever Aiba leaves for work.

“Hm, I’m not sure. They say it’s a six month contract.”

“So you’re not going to be here this Christmas.” Aiba’s hands stop folding his clothes and stares at the other’s form sprawled on the living room carpet. He goes to him and gives him a hug.

“Come on, Nino-chan. I wish I can spend Christmas with you but…”

“I get it, I get it. You don’t have to worry about me.” Aiba’s face is displaying a pouty expression but Nino doesn’t mind it. Then Aiba moves closer and kisses him on the shoulder.

“I’m not mad.” Nino says yet the other still continues to kiss so he puts down the controller and captures smirking guy’s lips above him.

 

\---

Aiba is the person who gets confused easily. Sometime, it took him awhile to understand what’s going on. And Nino knew that. That’s why he tried his best to help him, to not confuse him in certain things but there would be times when Aiba has to solve it by himself as the solution lies to him.

“What would you do if for example, you find out that I have feelings for Jun?”

Nino’s hand stopped pressing the controller. The character he’s controlling died and the sound of ‘GAME OVER’ played on the background.

“It’s just a hypothesis,” Aiba said though Nino can see something in his eyes.

“Do you?” Aiba blinked at him.“Do you have feelings for him?”

Aiba silently blamed himself from asking the other with that question.

“I don’t know, to be honest.”

“Whether it’s the truth or not, I can’t really do about your feelings. It’s something personal that only you can decide what to do.”

\---

When he got the privilege to go abroad and study, he was happy as it’s been his dream to go overseas but at the same time anxious and scared to left Nino alone especially with the situation they were in yet Nino let him go, assuring him that he’ll be fine and that he could take care of it. And so he went.

It helped him a lot, the studying abroad as during that time, he met an important person that would change his life soon, if not now.

“You should go, _now_.”

“Eh?” Aiba stared at his friend, sitting beside him.

“You should try. Go. Never leave regrets, right Aiba-chan?” The smile wore by his friend gave off a warm feeling. Aiba understood what the other was trying to say. He nodded and smiled.

“Thank you, _Captain_.”

\---

If that time, Aiba thought as he sat on one of the bench at the airport and waited for Nino.

“Nino-chan.” He called the other man who kept on looking all over the place. He looked at his watch. It’s almost time for his flight.

“Aiba-chan, just a couple of minutes,” Nino said. Where the heck was Jun? He thought.

“He’s not coming, is he?” Nino turned and looked at Aiba. Something was in the older man’s eyes, sadness and pain.

“Ah, Aiba-chan.” He gripped the other’s hand.”I just want the both of you to get fix.”

Aiba smiled. He appreciated the gamer’s concern but maybe Jun didn’t really wanted to get fix now.

“Maybe next time, Nino-chan.” Then they heard all the passengers of Aiba’s plane to check in already.

\---

What if Jun came that day? Would he still go overseas or would Jun ask him to stay? What if there was no next time?

“Aiba-chan.” He looked up and saw Nino walking towards his direction. All the things he’d been thinking wash out as he stood up and met the other man.

“Ah, you should have told me you’re going home now. I have work, you know. I just made an excuse.”

“Sorry, sorry about that.”

Then without warning, Aiba embraced Nino. Nino froze from shock then hugged him back. It felt good to feel this warmth again. He missed this. He nuzzled the other’s neck. He even missed this scent.

Nino, meanwhile would love to continue what they are doing however people were starting to stare at them and the last thing he has on mind is public display of affection. And so, he ran his hand from the older man’s back up to the shoulder.

“Ah, I love to continue this but we’re being looked at, you know.” Nino whispered and gently pushed Aiba but still holding his hand.

“Come along now. I have to show something interesting.”

“If you say so.” Aiba said as he got his bag and luggage.

\---

He knew someday, Jun would try to know everything; the reason why he left, why he didn’t answer the numerous calls and emails and the many whys written on the thousand postcards. He just knew that Jun would one day confront him and asked him to tell the truth. He had predicted there would be time but he didn’t expect that fateful day would come quickly just like now.

Jun was standing in front of him. Nino had left them alone. Aiba tried to look him straight in the face but somehow he failed. Instead, he started to play with his fingers. Neither one of them was talking. The silence between them was slowly becoming heavy. Aiba was in the middle of thinking of how he would come out when Jun cleared his throat. It was the younger man’s way to catch his attention.

“Why? Why didn’t you tell me?” Jun looked at Aiba, waiting for an answer. Aiba faced him, opened his mouth but no words came out. He observed the other with sadness in his eyes.

“Aiba.” Jun called. Aiba refused to look at him. The younger man held his wrist. “Masaki.”

“What do you want to know?” Aiba finally said. Jun felt hurt hearing the question.

“Everything.” He whispered. “Everything.”

Aiba looked at him. Jun let go of his wrist. Then Aiba smiled sadly. “There’s nothing to tell.” He lied. There were a lot of things to say.

“I demand to know the truth Masaki, especially I’m involved in this.”

Aiba stared Jun. What did he mean involved in this?

“Jun, I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“You exactly know what I’m talking about. Please Masaki, don’t do this to me.”

“What is it I’m doing to you exactly?”

“Keeping secrets.”

Aiba didn’t answer. Did he found out or maybe someone told him but who?

“We’re best friends, Aiba. Best friends. Best friends don’t suppose to be keeping secrets. They’re supposed to be sharing.”

“Where did you learn that, Jun? Best friends, sure they share things, tell stories and that but not all of the time. And besides, you stopped being my best friend that day.”

So he took the words he said seriously. Jun thought. “You are still and will always be my best friend, you know that.”

Aiba looked at him sadly. How did everything they had ended to this? “It’s three years late, Jun. whatever you’ve been digging up, just let it rest.”

“No, I want to know it. You hide it from me.”

Aiba laughed hollowly. “Are you telling that I should have told you before? Is that what you want?”

“Aiba.”

“Then what? What will be the difference it makes if I told you? Jun, do you know exactly what might happen if I told you that time?” Jun this time didn’t answer. Aiba observed him, waiting.

“I’m your best friend,” was all that Jun can answer.

“Exactly, and that mere fact prevented me from telling you how I feel. I don’t know why you are bringing this thing up. It’s already been three years. I’ve already accepted the fact that we’re not meant to become lovers. I already accepted that we’re best friends.”

“You should have told me still.” Jun cried something he didn’t do in front of anyone. “You should have still told me.”

Aiba watched Jun then he saw in his best friend’s eyes the three painful years he had undergone, three painful years he had after he went overseas. Then he realized what he had just did to his friend. He approached him and embraced him. Jun sobbed on the older man’s shoulder.

“You’ve got to let go, Jun.” He whispered. “It’s been three years. I’ve already let go and moved on. You have to do it too. For you and for him. Don’t be stuck in the past. Stop blaming yourself. You didn’t do anything wrong.”

“But Aiba, what about…” Jun looked at Aiba. “Don’t make it hard for you.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. Like I said, it’s not your fault. You just had to choose. That’s all.”

“I’m so sorry. If only…”

“Don’t say that. It’s like you regretted making that decision. That’s not the Jun I know.” Jun smiled and wiped the tears falling from his eyes.

“He loves you and you love him too, right?”

“You two look good together.”Jun hugged him tightly. Tears uncontrollably fell. Aiba hugged him back. “I’m sorry and thank you.” Jun let go and faced him once again.

“Go now.” Aiba said turning away as he tried to hide his tears. “He’s waiting for you.”

Jun smiled. He leaned in and gave Aiba a peck on the cheek and started to walk away.

 

_At present..._

Aiba opens their apartment’s door and sees Nino’s standing in front of him, waiting with arms crossed. His eyes catch the food and cake on the table too.

“I’m back.” Aiba says softly, still standing at the door.

“Well, don’t you just stand there? Come inside.” Nino says. Aiba pouts because he’s hoping the other would do something. He closes the door behind him as he takes off his shoes. He hears footsteps and before he lifts his gaze, Nino’s already embracing him. He can’t help but to smile as he embraces him back.

“I miss you.” Nino murmurs.

“Me too.” Nino lets go and hits the older man on the head.

“Aww.”

“I miss doing that too.” Nino smirks while Aiba massages the spot where he was hit and smiles as well.

“Welcome back.”

“I’m home.”


	6. We discover new things and people

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ohno thinks back how he meet those four guys and manage to make a change in their lives.

A guy wearing Hawaiian shorts, floral prints and sandals stands on the port with fishing equipments.

“Ah, today’s going to be great day for fishing.” He says as he looks up the sky. Then his attention shifts to the group of people walking and talking happily, he finds himself thinking four persons. He smiles.

“I wonder if what they are doing now.” He ponders that he doesn’t notice the fishing boat arriving or his fishing buddies calling him. 

Back then he had no idea that the four person he met in past were connected to each other. Until one day he decided to invite them all. He then realized they were actually broken, the four of them. 

 

\----

 

“Is there something wrong” Ohno asked as he stared at Nino, Jun and Sho. He felt an awkward atmosphere floating them. 

“I…” Sho paused when the door of shop opened and Ohno turned around.

“Leader, I bought you some souvenirs. You like sculptures, right?”

“Aiba-chan.” Aiba stopped talking and looked at the persons Ohno talking with.

“Nino-chan? Sakurai-san? Matsujun?” His voice sounded surprised. He was shocked to see them here.

“You guys know each other?” Ohno asked. He was surprised too. Before Aiba could come closer to them, Jun stood up and grabbed his things.

“I’m sorry, Ohno-kun but I remember I have an important appointment. We’ll have to talk some other time.” Jun excused himself and walked out the shop, not looking at Aiba.

“I… I’m so sorry. I’ll, I’ll just give you a call.” Sho got up and bowed. He dashed out, following the younger man. As soon as the chime hanging on the door stopped moving, silence enveloped the shop.

“Come here, stupid.” Nino decided to break the uncomfortable silence by motioning Aiba to sit beside him. The older man complied. 

“I’m sorry.” Ohno apologized to the two persons left. He stared the entrance door for awhile before deciding to make coffee for the two.

“I didn’t know.” The owner started, looking at Aiba and then to Nino. 

“It’s okay, Leader.” Aiba smiled weakly while Nino just nodded. Under the table, the gamer held tightly the older man’s hand. It was shaking. 

“How did you meet them?” Nino was curious.

“Well, I met Matsumoto-kun during my apprenticeship while Sho-kun was at a bar when I returned here.”

“You knew those two know each other?”

“No, just recently when I bumped to them.” 

“Ah, I see.” 

“You and Matsumoto-kun are not in good terms?” Ohno asked Nino.

“Me,” Aiba replied, “Me and Jun are not in good terms.” 

“He’s not being friendly with me too.” Nino added quickly.

“That’s because of me, Nino.” Aiba answered. 

“Is it about the one you talked the other time?” Aiba looked up at him. Ohno didn’t have to hear the other’s answer.

\----

 

_You know, you’re quite insightful though you don’t appear to be._

\--Aiba

 

Aiba was the first person Ohno had met. They saw each other in an art store where Ohno was working as an apprentice of the owner of the store who happened to be an artist and sculptor. He found the other man looking around and searching for inspiration in cooking. Ohno laughed at the student’s answer and replied that he was in the wrong store. 

“So you’re an exchange student from Japan studying culinary arts here?” Ohno asked the younger man when the store owner permitted him to have a break. 

“Yes.” Aiba nodded as he chewed his food and took a sip of his coffee.

“Ah. That’s nice, very nice.”

“How about you…”

“Uh, Sorry. I forgot to tell you my name. Ohno, Ohno Satoshi. Me? I’m actually trying to gain some experience here by working as an assistant here.” 

“Why here? It’s very far from Japan.”

“Well, because I’ve wanted to try a lot of things and discover new ideas. So when I come back, I might be to create something wonderful.” He turned and smiled at the younger man who was looking back at him. 

“Wow. That’s a great dream, Oh-chan.” 

“Oh-chan?”

“Yup. That’s what I’m going to call to you. You can call me Aiba-chan.” Aiba beamed.

\----

 

 _“Do you even know the meaning of privacy?”_

\--Jun

Ohno met Jun when he was staying in Austria. The younger man appeared to be wandering. 

“You seemed to be lost.” Jun and looked at the man standing behind him. 

“Excuse me?”

“Well, you have that kind of expression written on your face.” Jun decided to ignore and was about to walk away when the other man spoke again.

“If you like, I can help you. I’m familiar in this place.”

This time, Jun turned full time and looked at his supposed to be savior because he was indeed lost. 

“Do you know how I can get to this place?” 

“Yes, I know that. I’m Ohno Satoshi.”

“Matsumoto Jun.” 

\----

 

_“So aside from reading other people, what do you do?”_

\--Sho

 

Sho and Ohno met in a bar. The latter was sitting alone drinking his beer when Sho came and sat beside him.

“You don’t look okay.”

Sho turned and observed the person beside him. “Do you read people usually?” He can’t help but asked the man who for a moment think and then shook his head.

“But I always get that impression most of the time. So I'm right then?” 

“I can’t see the point why you shouldn’t tell your love your affection.”

“It’s really hard and long to explain.” 

“I have the whole night free for you.” 

“It’s either you don’t tell him and feel sorry for the rest of your life or you tell and who knows, he might feel the same way. We never know what will happen but isn’t that one reason why we are attracted to love itself, its mystery.” 

“But, isn’t that false hope?”

“When it comes to love, everything is unexpected. There are no false hopes.” 

“You know what, that person you love might be falling in love to someone else at the moment and if you don’t go and tell your feelings, you’ll really be regretting it. 

\----

 

_“You’re a charming nosy owner. Has someone ever told you that?”_

\--Nino 

The last person he met was Nino who happened to be a customer of his bakery on Christmas eve a year ago. After getting back from his trip, he decided to build a bakery. It was one of his dreams, to own a bakery because he was after all a bread aficionado. He opened it up just across a videogame store, the very same store where Nino worked in. 

The door chime moved, signaling someone entered the shop.

“Welcome.” 

Nino entered quickly and looked at the display. Today was Aiba’s birthday. Even though the man was in the overseas, Nino felt the need to celebrate.

“you can try our strawberry caramel cake but I recommend my all time favorite, choco delight with white bonbon” Ohno commented as he pointed out. 

“Uh, excuse me. Can I choose on my own?” Ohno nodded as he stepped aside and watched the man decide in silence. 

“Are you thinking of giving to someone? Well, I strongly suggest this chocolate caramel heart cake.” 

Nino shifted his focus back to the man behind the display. “Are you always like that?” 

“No, it’s just that it’s almost closing time and it is Christmas Eve. I’ve got to go home. My mother is waiting for me.” 

Nino stared him in disbelief before smiling. “Okay, you should be thankful that you’re a cute but nosy owner. I’d like to buy the chocolate caramel cake.” 

While waiting for the cake, Nino’s mobile phone started to ring. “Hello. You’re calling a little early. What? I’m... "

“Thank you for buying. Please come again.” Nino looked at the owner for a moment before leaving. 

\----

 

Nino and Aiba receive a delivery of pastry and sweets with a card on it delivered to their apartment few days after the incident in Ohno’s bakery. At the same time, someone sent a strawberry chocolate cake to Jun and Sho’s home. There was note on it. 

Don’t keep waiting otherwise you’ll miss the chance. Stop taking people for granted. Learn to forgive and learn from the past. What’s important is the present. Be happy.  
Ohno 

Nino is already smiling while Aiba wipes away the tear that just fell. Moments later, their phone is ringing. It’s Sho, asking if they meet now. 

\----

 

“Excuse me. We’re looking for Ohno-kun?” The girl wearing a toque with apron on turn around and finds four guys on the counter.

“Oh, he’s not here.”

“Is he home? Can you call him and tell his friends want to see him?” The tallest of them, she assume asks. “We just really need to see him.” 

“Or you can tell us where he lives so we’ll just visit him.” The other in checkered shirt and hat adds. The girl stares at the four eager guys confused then she remembers last week’s incident.

“Will you deliver these to the address written on the box? Make sure they personally get these okay? If ever they will come here and look for me, please tell that I’m on fishing expedition and you don’t know when I will be back.” Ohno said to his assistant one week ago.

“Why? This is not prank or something, right?” Ohno smiled at her and grabbed his things. 

“You take care of my shop for the meantime. See you.” 

 

“I’m sorry but he went for a fishing expedition three days ago. I don’t know when he will be back.”

“What?”

 

“Can you believe that?” Nino shakes his head.

“He’s a peace maker.” Jun thinks as he glances at Aiba then grins. The latter smiles back. 

“An angel in disguise.” Sho says nostalgically as he reaches for Jun's hand.

“But I guess he’s really an impressive guy, right Masaki?”

“Hmm…he’s a leader, after all, ”Aiba says. The other three look at him then nod. They are on their way out when Aiba notices scrawl near the entrance. 

For all those who get lost or feel lost in this world, you are welcome here. 

“Well, he’ll be back and we’ll wait for him.” 

 

Somewhere in Japan waters territory… 

 

“Ah, captain this feels good.” The tanned guy exclaims as he breathes the sea air. “We’re going to catch some tuna."


End file.
